Ann Takes the lead!

I read Ann's blog today and it gave an interesting history of her life, Jill did the same thing and i found it useful to see the background that people have had, i think we make suppositions about people and have new insight when they reveal more of themselves so to that end a potted history will follow..... i expect my boys to see this one day too and a history of my life so far might interest them one day.

Me a year old

Me and Jayne my mum and two of my cousins one french one english.

In singapore

With one of the nurses on leaving hospital

Dad and me when he was ill

So Born 25th October 1962 a year and one month after my parents married both for the first time Dad at 34 mum at 39 she had me at 40 so a much older mother than a lot of people may have had in those days. Only one of my grandparents was alive at the time my Dad's dad and he died when i was 6 months old. Around the same time my dad was diagnosed with prostrate cancer and i was given 50 50 after dehydrating and having febrile fits....my mother miscarried before having me so i made it by the skin of my teeth. They couldn't have more children but dad at least after radiotherapy got the all clear, it is only now that i really have thought about what he and mum must have gone through at the time.Dad was in the army the Royal Army Medical Cour so we moved around a lot from Hounslow, to Singapore, colchester, Mill Hill, and Aldershot which i loved. I met my friend Jayne there at age 5 and we are still in touch, whilst living in Aldershot  dad decided to leave the army after 22 years and secured a job as head of haematology at a hospital in Gt Yarmouth Norfolk. Mum never worked but before marrying had worked in labs too doing research and taking bloods. They both met at night school in London.
We moved to Gt Yarmouth when i was 8 our house wasn't ready to move into so we rented holiday homes until it was. I just remember going to one school for a short while and then moving to another.

Singapore with Dad

I had the great misfortune of joining a class in my new school once we got to our own home, with the worst teacher i have ever known....Mrs Peek! Her son was later to be knighted and be responsible for all the beacons lit across the land for the millennium and most recently the diamond jubilee. I digress she was awful had favourite pupils and treated me appallingly as i wasn't one of them, i had glue ear too and was significantly deaf before i had an op to have grommets later in the year, i used to suddenly find her shouting at me, as i obviously hadn't heard her, she was awful awful treated me so badly. It wasn't the best way to start a new life and i wished that dad hadn't left the army as i enjoyed that life much more.
I lasted a year in her class and then moved to Junior school, i hadn't made friends yet and finally met a girl called Debbie who lived in the next road and we became firm friends. Debbie and i drifted once we reached Grammar school as we were in different classes. I saw her later on after we both left as i had been told that she had suffered a brain tumour. She looked well and happy and we reminisced and that was the last i saw of her, a couple of years ago at a school reunion i was told that she had died about 10 years ago.
My parents always encouraged me to have friends as i didn't have siblings and i started having parties at home initially tame affairs with a few girls and a token boy but they developed into bigger dos and as my mum was responsible for booking the local village hall they expanded and we had them there. Any excuse for a party!!! They did become the stuff of legend and people still remember them.
As kids we just think that everyone lives like you i think, since leaving school and recently catching up with old school friends i have discovered things about them that i never knew at school. That Caroline after going on holiday with me arrived back home to be told be her dad that he was divorcing her mum, and how they both moved her between each other......that Elaine's dad who was my form tutor in 6th form had a drink problem and was a tough father. I never knew this but then they weren't aware it seems that my mother suffered from Manic Depression and would sometimes be sectioned or i would have days and weeks of her ups and downs to deal with. I remember coming home from school one day to find a hole in the glass panel of the front door when i went in i found a policeman, doctor and social worker i guess and dad with mum as she had blacked out apparently and put her head through the door. They were in the process of sectioning her, that was out of the ordinary but i obviously never told anyone, that was my life. What must all of us have been going through as kids and never telling our friends. My mum's depression lasted the rest of her life and became worse after dad died, it was certainly never dull especially when she was on her highs!
in 1979 i read a magazine called FAB 208 linked to radio Luxembourg which i used to listen to at night under the covers with the signal waxing and waning, it was the only late night popular radio station to listen to. In the magazine was an article about gateway clubs for as it was termed in those days the mentally handicapped, now people with a learning disability. I decided i could volunteer and without telling anyone went along to the local club and helped out, which i did for the next two years until i left home.

My first job was in Regent road in Gt Yarmouth in a restaurant making desserts and teas and coffees i then secured a weekend job in Woolworths i loved it there and towards the end of my time in 1981 was working nearly full-time, i also got an evening job in Tiffanys nightclub doing the food, chicken in a basket etc in the oasis tower on the seafront, i never did bar work as i couldn't add up!. That was a great summer of radio 1 dj's and various bands coming to play, beach barbeque's and discoing after the club had shut.
In 1981 after finishing my A levels i came to London after a meeting with a careers adviser who told me about CSV an organisation that places people in a social care setting anywhere in the country. I ended up at Holmbury Dene a home for people with learning disabilities in South east London where i worked for a year as a volunteer and then got a permanent job with them.

dad and Adam 2 months before he died

In 1983 i worked in a home in Bromley, then for Greenwich Mencap moved to A home in Lewisham in1987 as assistant officer in charge and after that to Southwark as a deputy in 1993. In 2004 i applied for a managers post and was successful then later in 2007 whilst i was still off after my op i was offered a service manager post temporarily which i did for the next 2 years. We then had redundancy looming and i applied for the area managers post which i got which entailed managing two homes instead of one for no more money...recession. In April 2012 i retired due to ill health.

Joe cuddling Adam

One of the last pics of Mum

Zak

Rachid

In 1982 i went on holiday with a friend to tangier in Morocco, where i met Rachid who later on would come to the uk to visit and whom i would eventually marry on 23rd Sept 1988, the same date that my parents were married in 1961. We had Joe in on 8.2.92 then Adam 16.4.96 and finally Zaki 22.11.99. Unfortunately a couple of years later we drifted and he ended up living in a room downstairs which he still does. We have had difficult and bitter times in this situation but presently we get on and he is being a bit more helpful than he has been. Dad died of cancer in 1996 and mum ten years later in 2006 nine months before my diagnosis, of cancer too.
So there are obviously loads more things i could tell you but i think this is enough.

Summer of Love

I have loved the summer of sport that descended upon the capital in July. Initially i didn't get on board and especially as you could only use visa to buy tickets....all my credit cards are mastercards i didn't buy tickets in advance. However as the games started i was hooked watching the frantastic acheivements of our sportsmen...i use the term generically here. I was lucky to attend some events because of good friends who had tickets to spare, including someone from the Beating bowel cancer forum! This enabled me to take the boys to the paralympic athletics. We loved it we cheered and stood in awe of the fantastic atheletes. We watched the blind long jump ...... in silence that is the other overwhelming experience to sit in silence in order to enable them to acheive, we did the same at the equestrian so we didn't spook the horses. A singular experience, the girl who eventually won the long jump encouraged us on her last jump to clap along as she had already won and boy did we cheer and clap till our hands were sore.

Danny Boyle and the Boys

It was lovely to have a day with the boys and we headed off to Westfield afterwards for a bit of shopping, something we all enjoy far too much. I love to spend time with them which doesn't happen so often now that Joe is 20 and Adam 16 they have their own lives to lead away from their mother, and Zak is moving that way too. They have their moments but i am proud that on the whole they get on, chatting joking and ganging up on be together at times. We had a lovely day and returned a couple of days later to attend the closing ceremony of the paralympics. We had great seats looking head on, they were still within the main body of the crowd and it was with exreme surprise that i turned in my seat to be confronted with the face of Danny Boyle who was responsible for the main opening ceremony, i quickly hissed to Joe and the boys so as not to be too obvious as you do that...it's Danny Boyle 'where' there just behind me!!! Joe immediately jumped up and landed next to Danny who at the time with his wife was tryingt o sort out his seats by asking us which numbers we had so that they could orientate themselves....turns out they were to the left of us across the aisle in the same seats. He was very nice and kindly stood with my then all three boys to have his photo taken with them, and they in turn were in the camera lenses of all the people behind and along from us who had just cottoned on to who they were standing with.
At the end of the evening as we left the park we came across a brass band a small affair playing modern tunes with trumpets drums etc and a huge tuba! The joint was rocking everytime they finsihed one song the cry ran out for more not least led on by my three boys. They were dancing and singing and encouraging others to do the same, at one point they were so entertaining that they became the next main attraction to the band itself, the conga'd around the park and whooped and hoollered for more. When Zak complained of thirst a woman who was wlaking away next to us handed him a bottle of water. People chatted and shook hands on departing. Games makers smiled and showed us the way home and Policemen did the mobot en mass.
Great times and great memories for the boys to store. It was for me a relief to see that they are able to hold their own and get along, it always comes back to what happens if i am not around, i think they will be ok it will be hard but their lives will go on without me......spectacularly!!!

No mans Land end of Chemo...... for now!

Finished the last of the capecitabine tablets yesterday which means this cycle of Chemo is over ........ yay no more feeling tired and hands and feet hopefully will return to normal soon they have been sorely tested with this last lost of capecitabine i think because the dose was increased when i stopped the oxalyplatin. I wonder if i had continued with the oxy whether these mets might have been blasted more thoroughly should i have been stronger and continued longer? I know that it probably wasn't as bad as what others go through a little sickness but not loads it was just that the symptoms were making my feet worse and i was worried that i would have permanent neuropathy in my hands.....but is that the price i have to pay? They have said i can go back to it again if need be. Maybe further down the line longevity will seem more precious than it does now. I find it hard at the moment to feel like i am fighting for my life as i feel so well, but in essence that is what i am doing every day!! and will i feel i let the boys down in the future for not being strong enough now. It's such a hard road at times......for now i need to get back to making the most of my time rather than letting the days slip away as they have done lately. I need to get my feet sorted they are sore leathery numb and i have achilles tendonitis to boot! Walking especially after a period of rest is a lumbering affair in the morning i have to take the stairs one at a time like an old woman!!
Well scan next week doc the day after and then what happens next!!?? for the short term i am entering no mans land that bit of no chemo in between the march of the mets! where nothing is being done and we play the waiting game!

From dates to demise

Well since i last wrote two important dates passed by on July 30th marked 16 years since i lost my Dad to cancer. I had always been very positive until that point about how cancer can be beaten, dad had it when i was a baby he under went a course of radiotherapy, i don't think he had chemo then this was 1963 i made it by the skin of my teeth, mum and dad married in Sept 1961 before i was born mum miscarried and i arrived the following year Oct 1962 right in the middle of the Cuba crisis what kind of world did they think i would join? Mum rode through the winter of 63 keeping a small baby warm, and then i don't know when each event happened but i was taken ill around 6 months with febrile fits and dehydration which they thought i may die from and dad had his cancer. It is only now really nearly 50 years on that i can appreciate the turmoil that she and he must have gone through, how lucky i was that i survived and that Dad beat the odds and lived for a further 33 years, only to have the cancer return practically to the same spot but on the pelvic bone, so painful. He remained with us for 9 months from diagnosis, i was pregnant with Adam at the time and life was good, i finally had the second child which would mean that my Joe would not have to live his life as an only like me. The day that mum called to say that dad had cancer i think i would have to say was the worst of my life to date, i think that bolt from the blue that indicates that your life is going to change forever is hard to take, for me even harder than actually losing him if that makes sense? it was all encompassing and i just couldn't take it in. I asked to be told what i was having so dad would know but they couldn't tell me and in the end he was still alive to see Adam who was born three months before he died. So every year i know that whatever age Adam is that is how long it has been since i lost dad.
The other date was the 8th August mum's birthday a week before a friend told me that she had a spare ticket to go and see the show jumping at Greenwich, just around the corner really i live very near. Her mum was going and brother and girlfriend, who i know, it was so apt! Mum would have loved the Olympics she loved sport any sport far more than dad did he was more inclined to go and tend the garden or his allotment than sit and watch football or tennis or show jumping which was her favourite, she rode horses as a child and encouraged me to do the same i would head off down the marshes each Sunday for riding lessons. One of my best memories is as a 12 year old or so galloping along the cliffs in Devon on our annual summer holiday. They knew me well enough now to let me hold back from the rest of the the riders and then gallop to catch up, i loved it racing along the cliff path as fast as i could go , very free and aware of the salt sea air and the connection with the horse taking me on this fantastic ride no theme park can give more of a thrill. So show jumping on what would have been mum's 90th birthday was apt very apt and i thought of her often as i watched them jump with bated breath.

Nick Skelton 

Typically the day i attended was the only day the GB team didn't win a medal!

The Egg Man!

I like the rest of the nation was enthralled with the Olympics and how well we were doing i took to checking the website occasionally for tickets, the last day suddenly tickets for the closing ceremony appeared, they weren't cheap but there they were! i clicked continue a few times till it seemed that yes they actually were going to allow my to buy them! oh boy should i shouldn't i? excitement took me over and i pressed the final button....once in a lifetime!!! me and Joe as the two youngest boys were going camping and if i had to choose i wouldn't i would have maybe not got them or gone with a friend. Adam still doesn't know that we went... It was phenomenal just to be in such an atmosphere. We arrived early and watched them set the stage then for an hour before the broadcast Andy Collins who met once and is noted for his ability to warm up the crowd, kept us amused and told us where they would like audience participation. We had to count down to nine and then announce it's 9 o clock which we seemed to do pretty well. When the pet shop boys came round we were supposed to all set our camera flashes off at once but that didn't happen. We were asked to sing along with Freddie which i think really didn't need stating and lastly to go Wooooo when Russell Brand announced that he was the egg man. I have to say that my favourite section was singing along to always look on the bright side of life, Dad loved it and i considered asking mum to use it at his funeral, but i didn't think she would have approved....singing it was joyous along with the national anthem in a roaring 80 thousand people crowd. We will rock you wore my arms out but not my voice, i even sang along to one direction! Was it worth it?.....i think so

Joe and I

Leaving the stadium was great fun a brilliant time with policeman posing doing the bolt or the mobot, having pictures taken with woman in blue suits with light bulbs on their heads.... flames wandering around as all the dancers etc didn't bother changing when they left. We sat on the DLR with a group of Morris dancers from Bristol who had auditioned for the games and ended up dancing with Eric Idle, they had green and red ragged tops and the bell on their legs of course jangling their way home, which happened to be in a tent in a garden in Catford where one of the troops parents lived....22 of them!! no expenses were given it seems only food boxes each day of rehearsal, their treat was to watch the rehearsal for the opening ceremony.
We queued for a cab at Lewisham with others who had been there, it was interesting how the spectators spread you could see them dotted around the bus stops in lewisham.
Finally another person i have met through our shared experience of having bowel cancer died last week. His name was Mark Browne, i never met him but we hooked up on Facebook a couple of years ago and since then we have exchanged messages a few times but in the main i just watched what was going on from a distance. He was out spoken and part of what i could see was a very loving family with three teens and a devoted wife, he was her Alpha a man's man he worked out in the gym and drove a van for a living up and down the country. He only stopped this a few months before passing, i noticed in the last couple of months that he had a problem going into hospital and then was shocked to see a pic of him, no longer the boys builder but very thin and looking quite frankly ill. He had a long time carrying on as normal like me, i truely feel his loss obviously from a distance, but it has also scared me a bit because of the rate of his decline, i have always imagined having time that deterioration would take place over a longer period of time. I think when you lose someone in your 'cancer community' it is always hard, but harder too because you wonder is that my pathway too? and it brings it home to me that it is likely to be me one day, i feel so well that i put those thoughts aside completely the reality of my demise is not present just yet, how will i feel when it is.....i may turn out to be a very different person than i am now, or maybe i will just go with the flow as i have done to date. Time to cancel those thoughts out i need to sleep......RIP Mark Browne x

Control

I was thinking tonight how annoyed i am with cancer for affecting who i am....not internally but physically yes should be the least of my worries but i didn't choose to have short grey hair, i guess i can change that but at the moment its a cheap option.
I have aged too.....maybe i look the same as i would anyway but i can't help thinking that it has happened more quickly.
Potassium deficiency turned me into an old woman hardly able to work up to a good pace anywhere i walked and if i did i was acutely aware that it was an effort. Early menopause, however i seem to be coping well in this area.....weight gain... comfort eating between chemos and my hands! and feet! The capecitabine has turned my hands into leather, tight dark coloured and itchy! dry skin cracked on one finger and my feet no better cracked and sore and dry and a funny colour.
Don't get me wrong i love the idea of getting old it is a privilege and one i will be very lucky to experience, when i see old people i envy them now their ability to get to an age where their kids are grown and they can play with their grandchildren, if only i was ten years older i could at last have experienced possibly my boys marriage or first child and know that they were old enough to ook after themselves. As it is the aim is to see zak to 18.....! 6 years and for goodness sake 18 is no age anyway.
I think losing control is why i sometimes take control in my own way. I am notorious for arriving at chemo sessions or blood letting at a time that i choose, i don't meant to be flippant or unreliable but i think it is my subconscious  control mechanism. I made a deal to leave hospital by going back to have an intravenous antibiotic...i didn't.
 Don't get me wrong i wouldn't do anything that would greatly affect my health but one doc had already indicated that she didn't think infection was my problem and neither did i....... i am still here!
Going on holiday,  deciding how to manage my hands and feet, arriving late being flippant about my situation, it's control i know how i feel, i don't like being dictated to.......maybe not the best way of dealing with things but it suits me!

Camp Bestival Hospital and re arrangements!

Drove off to Dorset to work at Camp Bestival on Thursday, wasn't a bad drive but on arrival i had to have a little kip on the grass in the sun. Zak and i headed off after my little siesta to get stores, noticing a sign to Lulworth Cove we did a detour and found ourselves amongst a mele of people with blow up boats and nets all prepared for their day out. It was hot so we treated ourselves to ice cream beautiful creamy gorgeous ice cream made on a farm Zak had a scoop of clotted cream and one of honey comb i had clotted cream and black currents and coconut.....lovely.

We then sauntered down to the cove, the smell of salty air was something i hadn't smelt in some years, not just the sandy beach smell but one that promised rock pools and seaweed in abundance. The cove is remarkably spherical with a small harbour entrance, lots of limestone and pebbles and kids clambering on the rocks with nets, a pastime as a kid i couldn't get enough off and peered in again as if a child looking to see if i would see a stickleback dart under a rock or the hint of a crab claw....no such luck too many had been there before. We found a reasonably comfortable rock and sat together looking out at the view and the various people passing around us, in the sun enjoying the ambiance.

We then set off for the supermarket only then to be drawn towards durdle dur, we followed the signs and found ourselves parked on a cliff top a little way in the distance was the formation of durdle dur but was a bit of a trek too far considering we really had other things to concentrate on...i was loving the time Zak and i weren't arguing he was enjoying the scenery as much as me and every time we passed through a quaint little village with thatched cottages the city boy would say oh mum we should come and live here!
We walked along the cliff a little way and then returned to the car and after driving for ages ended up in Poole where we bought the goods required. It had been a great day and ended with Zak and i sitting on sofa's in the middle of a field in Camp Bestival underneath the stars chatting.

That night in the tent was freezing! i didn't sleep until 6.30 when the sun appeared to warm my bones i finally appeared on the stall at 10.30. We worked pretty hard i think Zak was warned to stay away from the front of the cake stall but couldn't resist instead of wandering off to have fun he much preferred getting involved with serving customers. He added up ok and cut good slices for the customers, he told them what each cake was and was very polite. In fact as Lorna and Chunk whose business it is commented that he had been more help than the girls who had come along to help in the end. He worked like a trojan apart from when he met two girls whose mothers worked on the churro's stall....free churro's!!! he would on occasion hang out with them or they would come and stand byt he stall whilst he served chatting.....and giggling, he would later develop a fan club of another couple of girls who thought he was 'cool'
That night he hung out with the girls and i went to see Hot Chip it was 3 am before i returned and i could see him fast asleep in his tent. Again another cold night and less sleep my legs ached and me feet hurt but the stall was busy so time went quickly. I had another snooze by a tall fence keeping us away from the general public.....i was so tired i didn't notice it fall over me without hitting me and Chunk moving it back into position again!

One of the things Zak loved was that we got to camp in the main area behind the stall, i also managed to leave the car there too....no lugging ruck sacks and tents over miles of fields to get to our camping position, he thinks i should bake my cakes and have my own stall at Glastonbury so that we can camp near everything again!
That night we went and met up with friends of Lorna and Chunks who have a paella stall really nice crowd...we went on to dance in the speigal tent which was packed the night before there were far less people when we danced to discs made of shellac!
Zak loved the late night out with us and again was just such great company no moaning or complaining we headed back before the others as i needed to try and sleep.

The last day although Lorna encouraged me to go and see a band i really didn't have the where with all mainly because my legs ached so much i had cramp in the tent and then on the stall my thumb suddenly went into spasm, really weird.
We completed the day saw the paella people whilst Zak hung out with his girl friends again then i headed back having packed up in the morning i was ready to get home to a comfortable bed. I found Zak in the stall and we got into the car around midnight and headed home. I took a couple of stops to sleep and soon was sooo pleased to be back at home. I went straight to bed and asleep.
I woke up around 9 feeling really rough i was hot but felt cold and realised that i must have a  temperature. It is drilled into you when on chemo that you must! notify the hospital if you have a temperature so i called suite 8 Jean the chemo nurse answered and said i should come in. I had! to have a bath first and then fell asleep again she called to tell me to come so a friend came and helped me there.
Turned out i had a temperature of 38.4 so Jean gave me a bolus of antibiotics as they thought my picc line which had been infected and taken out the previous Wednesday was the cause. The dose immediately made me gag and i started to retch....... about half hour later i did actually throw up nicely in a bowl but the poor people hearing me gag in the suite. They decided to admit me and a porter wheeled me to Laurel ward.
I spent two days there with regular intravenous antibiotics and regular bloods. Later the first day they appeared with a couple of soluble tablets, i had a low potassium and needed to take the foul tasting tablets in water.
I also had low calcium my bowels were really loose and probably contributed to the mineral reduction. When i was finally released after a deal to return that night for another dose of antibiotics......i didn't ....i felt better than i had in ages suddenly i wasn't walking like an old woman and my legs had stopped aching!!
Who knew! ? i don't think i had an infection neither did one of the doctors, i think i was just run down but i would have carried on with the aching legs and lethargy that i have had for a few months. I feel sooo so much better and more inclined to cook and get things sorted and take the poor dogs for more walks than i had been doing.
The days in hospital co incided with a trip planned to Manchester for an Olympic match between Morocco and Spain my friend Tony drove the boys up for me and came back i had to arrange last minute train travel to get them back which cost a fortune, but they had a nice little adventure together up north!

Making Memories Vegas Baby!

It's been a While!!! had things to do people to see and places to go!
I flew out to Vegas on the 6th June with a couple of friends, the flight felt like one big party free booze and loads of guys in groups and girls flying out to have fun.

The flight went surprisingly quickly i watched the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel for the third! time and still enjoyed it. Getting nearer to landing the scenery below was amazing miles of desert interspersed with lakes.
Arriving in Vegas was a different experience to New York a few years previously much friendlier and able to have a giggle too!
The heat on leaving the airport was baking! we grabbed a cab and headed for the Bellagio i agreed on 35 dollars which included a tip he took my 40 very quickly and jumped in the car without giving change! stung and i had only just set foot in the country! mind you it was the only time in the whole holiday.

The bellagio was chaotic when we arrived at around 2pm their computer system had crashed and they were doing all bookings manually, we were told to come back at 5pm so we headed for the loo's changed into costumes and hit the pool for the afternoon.
On return to book in later it was still heaving it took a while but we got our room however it wasn't the room promised. We ended up there for the night and then had to move our cases the following day, certainly worth the trouble as we then had a view over the Bellagio fountains! They play to music and one of the channels on the tv plays the music every 15 minutes synchronised with the fountains below, completely mesmerising and i could have just sat all night watching them if there wasn't much more to do.

Still a way to go!

Vegas is BIG!!! everything is HUGE! I don't think you can grasp how big until to see it, above is a pic of the corridor to the rooms, you think having walked miles on the strip that you are nearly home on reaching the hotel .....but no! you still have miles to walk just to get to your room, through the reception then the casino to the lifts and then another mile from there to your door! A pic of the fountains from the room and then the hotel itself...due to some problems we had we were moved to a penthouse suite! if you look at the pic were it is bowed in the middle look to the left and then the two windows next to the bowed bit and just sitting on the top row of lights.....our room!
Because of the problems we had we got three extra nights free and our hotel bill voided!!! so we stayed 3 days longer we weren't ready to go at all until then. Moving twice had taken a couple of days out of our holiday pack ing then moving and unpacking.

The Sky Walk which we walked around..has a glass floor!!

The Hoover Dam from the Helicopter.

May  I Present the Grand Canyon!

But other than that the holiday was great i went to the grand canyon by road and then by helicopter which was just brilliant, we flew in at sunset into the canyon had champagne took some pics then flew back over the strip all lit up in the night.
We went to a club on the top of the RIO hotel which had 360 degree views of Vegas whilst you partied i had a bit of bump and grind with a DJ who was in for a festival. Had a few nights of staying out till the morning but not as much as my friends i did succumb a couple of nights. My feet were very painful walking because of the capecitabine but nothing i couldn't handle.

We went to a few hotels, in the Venetian we went on a gondola ride inside around the shopping area!, at the Paris on our last night we ate at Gordon Ramseys, we had a turn at the roulette table...i lost money and was an awful sore loser...:o( We partied at the Blue Martini which was a place recommended by the guys we met at the hard rock hotel and who we moved on with, nice guys on business from Canada. My friends left and i stayed with new friends i made for that evening, who gave me a lift back to the hotel afterwards.
Oh we just had a blast and hoping to return next year though it may fall on Glasto weekend! :o\

In terms of my cancer, it was fine i had my picc line in and the chemo nurses sent me away with a bag full of goodies to keep it clean, i swam with it...not to be recommended but i was ok, re insurence ....well i just kept my fingers crossed!!! far too expensive otherwise. Everyone has a different approach mine is to make the most whilst i can, i have already booked a holiday in Florida for me and the boys in October......making memories!!!!!